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eirenicalCaught up on a bunch of episodes of Glee today instead of doing anything productive. Loving Kurt more and more even though he made me cry in like... three episodes in a row.
Put off writing three papers -- all due Tuesday -- knowing I'm going to be stressed as hell about this in another 24-48 hours.
Also unintentionally spaced on posting last chapter of reallylongfic and now I'm not sure if I'll get to it before Tuesday. Damn it. I'll try for tomorrow.
Mom made split pea soup which is always my most favorite.
Had a fantastic winter concert at which I totally blew out what little voice I had left after the cold was done with it.
Yet somehow, in spite of all the good today, I'm kind of feeling lonely and worthless.
Maybe it's because a former client from my vet practice saw me at the concert and came over to say hello. Maybe it was because she was so clearly sad that I hadn't been at the vet hospital in so long. Maybe it was because she thought I was wonderful and she missed my being there... and I felt like a total ass because I didn't remember who she was. Maybe it's because instead of then thinking, "Gosh, that's sweet," all I could think was, "Where the hell were you people that love me so much when the few vocal clients that didn't were busy ripping me to shreds to my boss?" Maybe that made me feel like an even bigger asshole. Maybe the whole conversation was like a kick in the gut for making me once again feel pain over the loss of something that I thought I'd accepted.
Maybe it's just because after doing nothing more physically taxing that standing for a few hours, I was in more pain than I'd been since I originally hurt my back a year ago.
*sigh*
Suddenly I feel like screaming.
Fuck.
Don't mind me. I'm sure I'll feel better tomorrow.
Put off writing three papers -- all due Tuesday -- knowing I'm going to be stressed as hell about this in another 24-48 hours.
Also unintentionally spaced on posting last chapter of reallylongfic and now I'm not sure if I'll get to it before Tuesday. Damn it. I'll try for tomorrow.
Mom made split pea soup which is always my most favorite.
Had a fantastic winter concert at which I totally blew out what little voice I had left after the cold was done with it.
Yet somehow, in spite of all the good today, I'm kind of feeling lonely and worthless.
Maybe it's because a former client from my vet practice saw me at the concert and came over to say hello. Maybe it was because she was so clearly sad that I hadn't been at the vet hospital in so long. Maybe it was because she thought I was wonderful and she missed my being there... and I felt like a total ass because I didn't remember who she was. Maybe it's because instead of then thinking, "Gosh, that's sweet," all I could think was, "Where the hell were you people that love me so much when the few vocal clients that didn't were busy ripping me to shreds to my boss?" Maybe that made me feel like an even bigger asshole. Maybe the whole conversation was like a kick in the gut for making me once again feel pain over the loss of something that I thought I'd accepted.
Maybe it's just because after doing nothing more physically taxing that standing for a few hours, I was in more pain than I'd been since I originally hurt my back a year ago.
*sigh*
Suddenly I feel like screaming.
Fuck.
Don't mind me. I'm sure I'll feel better tomorrow.
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no subject
Date: 2010-12-12 03:02 pm (UTC)Glad your concert went well though (i mean, except for the blowing out your voice bit, obviously!)