Re: (4/4)

Date: 2013-06-01 12:22 am (UTC)
oooh, seriously, put down those Les Mis boys! I want more! (See! Look at my icon! Alex orders you to pay more attention to Hal! And by extension Fergus! She's making Hal threaten you with his scary blunt teeth!)

Loved this! My only quibble is that I think you need a little more (I can't believe I'm telling you that you need more words ;) ) to go from "mouthy little dicksplash" into the next paragraph to indicate that we've jumped into a memory. I thought there was a paragraph missing at first and had to read it twice, but once I realized where you were going there: APPROVED. Heartily.
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