Damn, I wish there was alternatives for you, but maybe setting those ground rules will help. *crosses fingers*

I wish I had some resources/suggestions for the ADHD thing. The only non-drug tricks I know are for helping with depression. (Though I need to sit down with a professional soon and nail down a proper diagnosis for me, because my tricks aren't working like they used to.) From what I've heard about psychiatrists though, drugs tend to be a last resort for most of them? Like if they can help you manage your stuff drug free first, they'll do that.